Prayers for Potty Training

I decided that I would blog about our ordeal adventure with potty training when I was sitting on the edge of our bath tub yesterday evening, the steaming hot water pouring over my feet.  I remember breathing in real deep over and over again, my mind silently delivering the same positive self talk speech it had been delivering for the past three days…..I looked down at the flecks of poop peeling from the soles of my feet and I swear a groan of exasperation escaped my lips when the poop swirled across our tub, circled the drain twice before disappearing.   When I was certain that my feet were thoroughly decontaminated of my sons feces I returned to the scene of the crime our bedroom to begin scrubbing the poop spots from our carpet.  I guess on Monday morning when I decided that this week would be the final attempt at potty training I supposed that it would go rather smoothly but alas it has been a week filled with experiences that are quite trying of my patience and supportive self-esteem boosting parenting style.  The days leading up to yesterday had gone quite well I had thought, but yesterday we had many accidents that left me feeling less hopeful and it was then while I was scrapping the crap off my feet that I knew we were in this for the long haul – but isn’t that what parenting is about anyway?

It had been just ten minutes prior that I was sitting on the floor sorting laundry while Jacob played at the side of our bed when I heard him  murmuring to himself about something or other….I paused, trying to make the room more silent, and could hear him muttering his own positive self talk…..”no poo, you have to stay inside, don’t come out on the floor”.  I leaped to my feet probably faster then my plus sized body should have been moving, weaved around the piles of laundry I had sorted and in a sort of bend and twist of my own body, I leaned forward scooped up my half naked son and said “hold it in buddy, hold it in!”…to which he replied “I’m trying mommy!!”.  I somehow managed to make it out of my room with Jacob dangling from my arms and as I hustled to make it to our bathroom a small turd escaped from between his skinny little butt cheeks, landed on the floor, and squished between my toes – sick.  Needless to say, I don’t think i need further explain how incredibly patient I’ve been trying to be throughout this process but the poop squished between my toes was too far over the line so I hollered for Mike to help me out, despite the fact that he had only just that moment walked in the door – welcome to insanity.

I have to say that I am tying very hard not to complain about how difficult this whole potty training thing has been for us because really it’s one of the only big transitions since Jacob was born that has been difficult or trying.  I don’t really have much advice to offer to anybody else out there that is trying to potty train because we (as always) are using a fly by the seat of your pants, praise often, and bribe occasionally method of getting this done and so far it seems to be working…..we are having about 65% success at this point which is far better than I ever expected we would be after day 4.  One piece of advice that I’d love to offer however is to stay away from any type of potty that makes sounds….especially ones with furry little red muppets named elmo branded on them because TRUST ME after the 800 thousandth time that you hear “ELMO IS PROUD OF YOU – HOORAY!” you might find yourself curled up in the corner of your room in the fetal position…..after very little thought I decided to ditch the elmo potty and on the advice of several of my fellow mommy friends we purchased this one by Baby Bjorn…..

I am hoping that it will be worth the forty dollars that we paid for it but the reviews are astounding apparently – who would have thought that people could write up such profound reviews of a product used to hold human excrement?!  I was just looking for the words MIRACLE POTTY to satisfy me, but what I found was soooo much more.  I am feeling rather inspired by this potty because as soon as we brought it home, positioned it in its new home in our faimly room, Jacob sat down and proceeded to fill it half way full with pee….ahhh my new friend, why did we wait so long to meet?!  I definitely think we’ll be able to store this one away for Violet to use one day!  The one good thing about this potty is that the penis shield is built in and non-removeable which is totally awesome…this means we will not have a repeat of today’s excitement which occured when Jacob excitedly sat down on the toilet but forgot to tuck his penis behind the small penis shielf and peed a glorius arc of yellow urine out onto the floor…..

How wonderful the things we do for our children – we are super hero’s us Mommies, willing to brave pee rainbows and poop squished between toes all for the better good of our children….

Pray for me as we continue to endure and hope….I think this is one area that Jacob is going to need to work at for some time – pray I have patience and that our new miracle potty works marvelously.

Please God?

3 thoughts on “Prayers for Potty Training

  1. Oh Melissa, I feel for you! You are right, it is one of the most trying times. It test our patience along with our kids. Our 1st go ahead with potty training was last October and it was a HUGE bust. We revisited the idea in January and it was a complete success. By the way we have that same potty. We choose that one because it seemed more comfortable for M since she is so tall and she does not have to sit lower to the ground like with the other ones.

    Good luck!

  2. A miracle potty, huh? Maybe I need to get Fritz one. He needs help climbing onto the toilet with the insert in it so it complicates things when he needs to go potty.

  3. Seriously….but why do Aunties have to endure pee rainbows?? I’m traumatized by Saturdays peeing event!

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