December, 2007:

Jacob woke up wearing his grumpy pants today. I suspect that he probably overslept last night since he went to bed at 7:30 p.m. and woke up at 9:20 a.m today….and sometimes when I’ve overslept I wear grumpy pants too. He didn’t want any real breakfast today so he had orange juice and applesauce….I have a sneaky suspicion that he’s got a nasty cold on the way – which would be ironic wouldn’t it? Since the doctor commented at his appointment about how long its been since Jacob’s been sick – I knew we were doomed when those words came out of his mouth! I felt like screaming NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO doctor we dont’ talk about that out loud! If getting a cold around Christmas time wasn’t enough of a pain in the butt – Jacob’s top two molars are coming in making his GRUMPY pants seem even bigger today!

We mostly hung out around the house wearing jammies but then we decided mid-afternoon (since Jacob was all anti-napping) to go for a walk, grab some lunch, and hit the post office. On our way back from our walk we grabbed a Poinsetta Flower for the house to add a bit more festivity – the snow was falling by then and Jacob was as excited as ever! By the time we reached the house again he had passed out in the stroller but my attempt to make a smooth stroller to crib transfer was unsuccessful and a short while later we were watching FROSTY the snowman for the 100th time this holiday season. Around 3 pm I decided I had enough of cranky boy who didn’t want to nap and I tried to get Jacob to lay down with me – bad idea. So after another 35 minutes Jacob finally went down for a nap and slept until 530 p.m. When he woke up he was wearing his happy pants! I was so relieved!

We’ve had our tree up for 2 weeks now but it sat bare for the longest time. Everyone told us that Jacob would just pull everything down from the tree so we were very apprehensive about putting the decorations on because I had envisionned a chorus of “Not or Jacob” or “No Thank You Jake” throughout the day. So slowly we’ve added decorations to the tree and the truth is – Jacob really LOVES them – in a good way! It’s as though he treasures them as somethign to only be looked at and admired. He stands back and proclaims LIGHT! when the tree is glistening…he’ll point to the sparkly Christmas balls on the tree and proclaim BALL! Not once so far has he taken anything off the tree…..we’ll see what tomorrow brings since the tree is officially finished now! I’d like to find a cheap new tree skirt though…and a few red Christmas ornaments to add the the mix! Other then that I think its perfect and beautiful and magical just like the Christmas season! Here’s a picture of the almost finished beauty!

I’ve had a crappy couple of weeks so today after a crappy morning I decided that Jacob and I would try to embrace the spirit of the season – and that we did! We went outside for a walk in the falling snow and Jacob wasa mesmorized! It was awesome!

When we got back in we had a spaghetti lunch followed by a bath for Jacob (with bubbles of course!) and then we got in our jammies, sat up on the couch and watched the Polar Express. Afterwards, we took a nap together in the great big bed……I found joy in doing all these things with Jacob – he is a piece of my soul walking around on earth.

Jacob had his 18 month appointment yesterday.

He’s now…

25 pounds 13 ounces…..

and 34 inches tall!

What a big boy he’s becoming!! Cant’ believe he’s grown so much! I remember when he was 6 pounds 5 ounces……seems so long ago now! Had he gone full term I’m sure he’d have been around 8 pounds!

Hiya Sweet Baby Boy!

Gosh kiddo…it seems so weird to call you baby boy when I`m sitting here writing to you on the day you turned 18 whole months old! 18 months! Wow. I just can`t believe that you`ve been in my life for 18 wonderful months already. You are my greatest joy – a piece of my soul walking in a pint sized body – the warmth in my apple pie. Every day you fill my life with adventure and love….so much love. Every single time I turn my head, there you are with your love….showing it to me in so many ways. Every single day I am finding moments to tell you that I love you in some way or another and as always you also find new ways to show me that you love me back. These past couple of months you’ve been full of hugs and kisses (or smoochies as we like to call them) and you’re learning to say I love you…..you can’t quite get all the words out yet but you sure can say I love…it’s the “you” part that we havent’ been able to master….but it’s ok sweet boy…I know that you are saying it to me because you look right at me with the softest most real smile and you say “I love” while you cross your arms over your chest and swing your body side to side – because of this and many other things you are my greatest joy.

Every day is like a new adventure for you. You’re discovering that life has so much to offer you – to teach you. There will come a day when you are older like me where you will suddenly find it hard to see how precious and cherished life is…I have days like those….where its hard to remember how new and wonderful life was when you were a child – it is for this reason that I want you to always keep these letters that I write to you, so you can always remember the joy and adventure of the world. I hope that through my eyes you’ll always be able to hold tight to the child you are today….this way no matter what, you’ll also always have a part of me with you to remind you of how important you were to me and how much I love you.

You’re learning to do so many things by yourself. It’s been such an experience watching you get applesauce all over your highchair or spaghetti sauce all over your face!! Even in your ears and up to your forehead!!!! You’ve been trying so hard to learn to feed yourself with a fork or spoon and it’s paying off! The other day for the first time you ate your WHOLE breakfast with a spoon and didn’t spill a drop on your shirt or high chair! I was so proud of you that I clapped and shouted hooray and you laughed at me before starting to clap too! Before I knew it we were both laughing and I pulled you out of the high chair and set you down on the floor and you kept laughing your head off while spinning around and around in a circle! I joined in and the two of use were twirling around the living room and laughing! After a couple of minutes we both fell down on our bums and you reached out your arms for me….we had the BIGGEST hug ever! Gosh I love you!

We spent the other day decorating our Christmas tree. Christmas time is Mama’s most favourite time of the year because everything about it seems so magical and wonderful and it seems for the whole month of December that all the silly and unimportant things in the world are gone and replaced with the reminder of what’s important…love. A few weeks ago many people told us that you’d LOVE the Christmas tree so much that you’d just pull all the pretty decorations off of it and that I’d find them all around the house….hidden in secret Jacob hiding spots! I imagined our tree with decorations that started just over your head and went up to the top…..but this has not been the case. You seem to love Christmas and everything about it just like your Mama does…you look up at that giant tree and you smile the biggest smile in the whole wide world – the lights twinkle and I can see their reflection in your eyes…It brings everything magical and important about Christmas right back to me…..it refreshes me, revives me, enlightens me. Do you see Jacob? You are my breath of life.

I expect that by the next time I write to you – you’ll be so different. This happens all the time and I’m overwhelmed AND excited for you because I know that the changes that are happening to you are important and exciting for you too! Right now your favourite word is “no” but you don’t really understand the meaning of it so when I ask you if you want a cookie or a banana….I know that when you say “no” you secretly mean yes please….

I have all the hope for you in the world…..

Hope that you can be everything you are destined to be…

Hope that you can fill the lives of other’s with joy and love like you have done to mine….

Hope that you will always find good in life…no matter what…

Hope that you will just keep being you…

The greatest joy of my life.

Love and Kisses…

Mama